Garden potions and notions to avoid

It’s Halloween and terrifying things abound – particularly at garden centers. Below you’ll find a pictorial approach to four frightful follies. Enjoy – and keep your garden safe!

Scary soaps. No. Not on your soil to aerate it. Not on your plants as part of some homemade devil’s brew. Soap stays in your house.

Scrubbing bubbles!
SOAP is not an acronym for Super Organic Agricultural Product

 

 

 

 

 

 

Petrifying phosphate. Not for flowers. Definitely not for transplanting. No matter how friendly and natural they look on the shelf, they are death to mycorrhizae and any aquatic system they wash into.

Mounds of mycorrhical mortality
“Bone meal” can be anagrammed to make “le bemoan.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Murderous mulches. No cardboard. No plastic. And definitely no astroturf. The word “smother” does not conjure up a pretty picture for living soils.

The chips are great. The cardboard….not so much.
Cardboard’s so resistant to water you can make ponds out of it!

 

 

 

 

 

There are faster ways to kill trees.
Is it mulch? Or a tire graveyard?

 

 

 

 

 

Artificial lawn should only be used for indoor minigolf.

Zany zombies. These useless products live on in their science-free environments. Just…go…away.

Business is good even if efficacy isn’t.
Yes, because plants love stag’s bladders and cow mesenteries.
I can’t improve on this description.

 

 

 

 

You can find posts on these products by using the “search” box on the left hand menu. Or you can consult your Ouija board using this handy mulch planchette.

Will my tree survive? Ouija board says “Goodbye.”

 

Published by

Linda Chalker-Scott

Dr. Linda Chalker-Scott has a Ph.D. in Horticulture from Oregon State University and is an ISA certified arborist and an ASCA consulting arborist. She is WSU’s Extension Urban Horticulturist and an Associate Professor in the Department of Horticulture, and holds two affiliate associate professor positions at University of Washington. She conducts research in applied plant and soil sciences, publishing the results in scientific articles and university Extension fact sheets. Linda also is the award-winning author of five books: the horticultural myth-busting The Informed Gardener (2008) and The Informed Gardener Blooms Again (2010) from the University of Washington Press and Sustainable Landscapes and Gardens: Good Science – Practical Application (2009) from GFG Publishing, Inc., and How Plants Work: The Science Behind the Amazing Things Plants Do from Timber Press (2015). Her latest effort is an update of Art Kruckeberg’s Gardening with Native Plants of the Pacific Northwest from UW Press (2019). In 2018 Linda was featured in a video series – The Science of Gardening – produced by The Great Courses. She also is one of the Garden Professors – a group of academic colleagues who educate and entertain through their blog and Facebook pages. Linda’s contribution to gardeners was recognized in 2017 by the Association for Garden Communicators as the first recipient of their Cynthia Westcott Scientific Writing Award. "The Garden Professors" Facebook page - www.facebook.com/TheGardenProfessors "The Garden Professors" Facebook group - www.facebook.com/groups/GardenProfessors Books: http://www.sustainablelandscapesandgardens.com

2 thoughts on “Garden potions and notions to avoid”

  1. “Cardboard’s so resistent to water you can make ponds out of it!” Most cardboard is not treated, as is the cardboard in the image. Therefore, most cardboard is not resistant (spelled with an “a”) to water.
    It soaks right through.

    1. You’re incorrect. Most cardboard – actual corrugated cardboard – is treated with coatings like polyethylene to resist water, or resins are added to the adhesives. This has come up before. We also have published research that demonstrates cardboard’s relative resistance to gas exchange. If gas doesn’t cross through easily, water certainly will not. If you’d like to link a scientific publication that shows “it soaks right through” we can send it to Amazon who I’m sure will make immediate changes to their apparently non weather-proof shipping materials.

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