Flowers for Barbara: Cultivating Hope in a Pandemic

Ever since humans started gardening and farming, the practice has had central importance in our lives. As we processed out of the agrarian age, some of us humans may have lost the connection to the importance of growing plants to our everyday lives. We rely on the growing of plants to feed us, to produce medicine, clothing, and shelter. We use plants to provide beauty in our landscapes and our homes. And perhaps one of the positives of the current pandemic is that many people are turning to plants as a way to assuage their fears. Being one of those extension people whose mission is to teach people gardening I’ve seen some of this first hand. But a phone call I received this week really drilled into my soul how important plants are not only for the food they provide, but also the way they effect our mental well-being.

Victory garden - Wikipedia
Victory Gardens Poster
Source: WikimediaCommons

As the last few weeks have unfolded, we’ve seen seed companies struggle to keep up with orders, garden center shelves empty of vegetable seeds and plants, and a general movement that what the National Garden Bureau is calling Victory Gardens 2.0. Many are saying that vegetable seeds are the new toilet paper. There are a few reasons that people are turning to gardening in a time of crisis. Gardening is seen by many as a grassroots way of ensuring food access. In addition, the ability to grow one’s own food not only produces said food but also provides a feeling of self-sufficiency for the gardener. The mere act of knowing that you have some sort of control over your access to food, because you can grow your own, provides a sense of calm. It helps ease some of the uncertainty of wondering if there will be produce at the grocery store or if you will have the financial stability to afford it. During the economic crisis of 2009, the National Gardening Association estimated that home food gardening (vegetables and fruit) increased by 19%. It might be too early to tell, but I suspect those numbers will be higher this year.


But lets get back to the phone call….
Gardening and plants also have a positive effect on mental-well being in a general sense. The act of gardening can produce a meditative like practice (unless you’re cursing at weeds or violently ripping out diseases plants – but those acts may provide catharsis). But research also shows us that just seeing nature can have a calming effect on our minds.

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Insult to injury: 6+ inches of snow after the frigid temperatures
Source: Scott Evans, UNL

This was so apparent in my recent call. I had received a voicemail from an elderly gentleman that asked for a call back as soon as possible so that I could talk to his wife (we’ll call her Barbara). I had time between back to back Zoom meetings, so I called. The gentleman answered and after I introduced myself he told me that Barbara had a question about flowers. After a few seconds, a frail, halting voice asked me if all the tulips and daffodils were dead. Over the previous few nights temps had dipped below the normal lows and many plants had seen some damage, including flowers of many early season bloomers.


I answered briefly that some of them were likely damaged, that the blooms would be killed but the plants would be OK. What happened next….I didn’t expect. Full on, gut-wrenching crying. The kind of sorrow that you can feel throughout your being. After a few seconds, between the gasping sobs, she uttered the words “I don’t think I can take it anymore. First we can’t see people. Now the flowers are gone.”


After the initial jolt, I tried to respond as I’ve been trained to do (we have luckily received training in mental health first aid to help clients who are in distress) – calm reassuring words, asking if she was OK, and providing positive affirmation that once the temperature warmed up there would be blooms again. Though she was so overwhelmed that she just said goodbye and hung up.


I was shocked. It took a few minutes for me to compose myself. I don’t often deal with clients where there is such an emotional response (hats off to my entomology colleagues who have to deal with telling people that they have bedbugs or that they might be suffering from delusory parasitosis). After I gathered my thoughts, I felt that I needed to call back – the emotional response was so strong that I wanted to make sure there wouldn’t be issues of self-harm or other effects.


In my return call, Barbara and I discussed that there would be more flowers once the weather warmed back up. We discussed our mutual love of plants and how they make us feel. She sees the flowers in the neighborhood when they leave their small apartment for errands and it makes her feel better. And even though there were still tears, both of us were in a much better place. Out of the blue, I asked if it was OK if I brought her flowers to enjoy until the weather warmed up. At first she was hesitant – she didn’t want to cause trouble. But after I assured her that making sure she had flowers would do me just as much good as it would her, she and her husband agreed. I told them that after I got done with my work for the day, I would find some flowers and drop them off on their doorstep.


I needed to make a (now infrequent) run to the store for necessities any way, so while I was shopping I picked up a potted plant at the grocery store (the one I thought would be easiest to care for). I went home and wrote a note, wrote down some simple directions, and delivered the flowers. As I walked away, I heard Barbara’s husband open the door and tell her that there was a surprise for her.


I have to say that I can totally understand this reaction that may seem excessive to some. Many people are dealing with the stress of the pandemic, some better than others. Here was one thing that was giving this lady enjoyment – seeing the flowers blooming when she is able to get out of the house. And that one enjoyment had been taken away by a late freeze. It drove home to me the fact that gardening and plants are essential for many. For the food that they can provide, both for nourishing our bodies and for nourishing our spirits. Plants are providing us hope for the future and calm for the present.

While I may never hear back from Barbara and her husband again, I can tell you that making that one connection through plants was definitely a boost for me. My wish is that those flowers give her hope for the future. A sense of calm knowing that one day things will return to normal, and the knowledge that one day soon the flowers will indeed bloom again.

Flowers for “Barbara”

Published by

John Porter

John Porter is a horticulturalist located in Omaha, NE. He is a former extension educator with UNL Extension and county agent with WVU extension. In addition to using his horticulture and extension skills in his home garden, he is a sometimes garden writer and lecturer, a trial judge for All-America Selections, and mentor for local school horticulture and agriculture programs.

9 thoughts on “Flowers for Barbara: Cultivating Hope in a Pandemic”

  1. This story was not what I expected to find on your blog. I came looking at pros and cons of sheet mulching for starting a garden (a Victory Garden 2.0). Thank you for sharing your love of plants with Barbara. This is a beautiful story.

  2. The garden center where I am employed is still open, as I think is quite proper. Because in the final analysis, we sell hope – a commodity very precious to us all in these unsettled times.

  3. Great story. Compassion for self and others goes a long way. Something we all could use more of. Thanks for sharing.

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